Hello my lovelies, new and old!
How is everyone? Doing well? I hope so
Personally I've had to jump a few obstacles lately, and although I certainly haven't forgotten them, they're in my rear view mirror at this point. I just have to focus on today, and making sure it's a better one than yesterday.
I'm not sure why I'm writing this journal, actually. I just felt like reaching out to you guys today for some reason and figured I'd go with it. I'm currently in the midst of going through all of my worldly possessions in order to decide what gets sold/donated/tossed and what I will take to college with me this fall.
Yeah, college! I can't believe it myself. Still holding on to the hope that we win the lottery or something to help with the cost, but we'll find a way to get through one way or another. I am heading to my top pick, after all!
It's certainly going to be a change, but up until a few months ago my life has felt terribly stagnant, and I'm more than ready for a change of scenery.
However I am a bit disappointed that I haven't written anything in quite a while, and haven't even had the urge to.
I'm sure I'll get back in the swing eventually (my creative writing classes should help with that), but that particular change still saddens me. I'm not even going to go into my total lack of photography XP
On the other hand, I finally finished the book I started several months ago! It took me an embarrassingly long time to do so, but I did, and I'm trying to be proud of it at the moment.
I've begun to sense that I'm at a large turning point in my life. I mean, obviously I know that after high school ends, the choices you make have an impossibly great effect on the rest of your life. That's not what I am referring to. I'm referring to an emotional turning point. I've come to the conclusion that many (not most by a long shot, but more than a few) of my recent troubles came from the fact that I'm having trouble reconciling the person I am now with the person I have always thought myself to be. Although their shadows may be similar, they are most definitely not the same person. My brain and heart haven't been on the same page in years.
And yet, as I type this out, a certain kind of calm has fallen over me. It's not quite peace, but it's approaching it. I haven't felt it in quite some time. It's almost...hope. I like it.
I think I'll end this spontaneous dive into my psyche on that note, since it's a positive one. Hopefully these kinds of thoughts will be more forthcoming in the coming months.
So for now I bid you all goodbye, and good day.